abc4 news recently posted a story about the necessity of custody orders for parents who are separating or divorced.
“In order to go to a trial, you have to go to mediation first anyway.” He added that doing this as soon as possible may end up saving couples time, money, and even help to maintain a cordial relationship between parents. “I tell people a lot, if you are already agreeing on almost everything, go to mediation right away before something happens.”
Done Mediation strives to help parents develop clear and concise parenting plans that have enforceable measures to protect children as needed.
The story also says:
Should the cordial relationship among parents sour in the future, the custody order may provide additional security if the police need to become involved. Felt further explained: “If there is no court document, most of the time the police can only say, ‘I’m sorry, there is no order, there is nothing I can do about this. You need to take it to the court.’”
Conflict between parents arises when one or both parties feel that their needs or expectations are not being met by the other. Often times these areas of conflict can be avoided in the first place by having well thought out and clearly defined parenting plans in custody orders.
It is vitally important that co-parents discuss what type of interaction and dynamic they want to have as co-parents. In cases of high-conflict, it is often in the best interests for all parties that there be very limited interaction and clear boundaries to assure the comfort and safety of those bound by that order.
For help with developing or modifying a custody order or parenting plan, contact Done Mediation today or schedule a session of mediation now.
Mediate.com recently published an article titled Top 5 Co-Parenting Apps for Mediation.
Apps are a recent and welcome tool to the world of co-parenting. Juggling schedules, finances, messages between two parties can be difficult and these apps hope to resolve many of those issues.
It is often the case, that co-parents are not able to think far enough ahead when they are in the process of divorce or separation. Their inability to picture an unknowable future will often times have them return to court for a parenting plan modification.
As a mediator, I like to suggest co-parenting tools such as apps to help facilitate coordination and communication when the parties are high conflict or simply disorganized.
It is always helpful to have update on the latest apps and the features they offer.
I found this interesting article on Babygaga.com about "parallel parenting" as opposed to co-parenting. The jist of it is that parallel parenting is ideal in cases where the parents to a child engage in a more business like relationship when it comes to parenting. Co-parenting is only possible when the two parents involved can communicate and work together on a mutually agreed upon parenting plan. When communication and collaboration are not possible, parallel parenting is the next best thing. Read more about parallel parenting here.
I don't often look to celebrities for their life choices, but in this case, it's great to see what ANYONE is doing for co-parenting that WORKS. Co-parenting is such an essential part of an divorce. It requires a lot of planning, communication and coordination.
If you're looking to be inspired, check out this article on insider.com
5 Signs Mediation Won’t Work for Your Divorce, According to a Mediation Expert - Dr. jann blackstoneRead Now
A new article on Yahoo.com goes over 5 basic signs that mediation may not prove to be productive.
Dr. Jann Blackstone says they are:
1. There’s So Much Animosity, You Can’t Talk to Each Other
2. There’s a History of Drug or Alcohol Abuse or Domestic Violence
3. There’s a Mental Health Issue
4. There’s No Seeing Eye-to-Eye on Custody
5. One—or Both—Parties Aren’t Willing to Put in the Time Needed to Sort Things Out
For more details and information, click on the link. In the State of Utah, parents seeking divorce are REQUIRED to attempt mediation unless they have a court exception. Just because it might not be productive does not mean you can avoid it all together. If you are looking for a mediator, reach out to us today and schedule your mediation.
The Digital Journal posted this about the costs of litigated divorce vs. mediated divorce.
"When going through a divorce process, money is often the last thing people want to add to their list of worries. Choosing to go through a litigated divorce is estimated to cost couples up to $32,000 and that’s if things go well as planned. In most cases, the cases don’t go well and even more money ends up being spent. Thankfully, mediated divorce offers a far more cost-effective alternative as everything can be mediated."
Read more: http://www.digitaljournal.com/pr/4715373#ixzz6Perjnhwq
Lexology.com featured a great article discussing the challenges of co-parenting during COVID-19. It may seem obvious that communication is not only important but essential in new ways during this “new normal”. They recommend finding the most effective means of communication and agreeing upon terms and use of that communication. It is important that co-parents are open and forthcoming about how they plan to approach parenting during their time. These methods of improved communication can be discussed and organized without tension in mediation. Contact us to schedule today.
I LOVE hearing about creative solutions to co-parenting! It reminds me that there is no one-size-fits-all answer. There is seriously a world of possibilities when two sides have an open mind. ABC news featured a group of adults with only kids in common who decided to rent a house and shelter in place ALL TOGETHER to the benefit of the kids they share! What a beautiful gesture at a troubling time. Their kids will undoubtably look back and see this crisis as a positive life experience even though it will be a crazy adjustment for everyone.
Familylawweek.co.uk posted an article about how to have mediation during a lockdown. They mention a lot of the issues that may need to be addressed during a lockdown situation:
What are some of the issues that could be addressed in mediation, that separated parents are facing during this unprecedented time?
The following is by no means an exhaustive list, but sets out some examples:
It is always helpful to look at other resources and see what other mediators are addressing during these ever-changing circumstances. If you need mediation to discuss these issues, contact us today. Don’t wait.
Law.com posted an article discussing how fortunate it is that the legal profession can thrive virtually as the many other industries are unable to adapt. They focus a few paragraphs on Mediation specifically and how it is essentially the same as in-person:
The Zoom technology is remarkably easy to use. The virtual mediations I’ve done so far have involved participants covering the entire spectrum of computer prowess, and all have fared quite well. More importantly, the real engine of successful mediations–personal connections—hits on all eight cylinders in the virtual format. Following one recent virtual mediation of a significant injury case, the defense attorney told me how she was able to adjust her comments in the opening by reading the reaction of the plaintiff on the video. Just as with in-person mediations, the real-time feedback is there.
So, from the perspective of our clients, virtual mediations have been an unequivocal success. And I can also say that, from a mediator’s perspective, it is no less so. Success for mediators comes only when we can personally connect with the parties and counsel. A quote attributed to Teddy Roosevelt says, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” At the mediation of any significant case, there comes a point when I am leading clients, step by step, to a place that, though necessary to get to, is tough terrain to traverse. If they don’t trust my judgment and motivation, they won’t take my hand. If you had asked me, even weeks ago, if this level of rapport could be established over a virtual medium, I would have said, “No way.” I was wrong. Happily, thankfully, mercifully, I was very wrong.
Done Medation plans to resume all mediations via videoconferencing using Zoom as mentioned in this article. To schedule a mediation for yourself, contact us today.
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