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12/15/2022

Co-Parenting during the holidays when you still share a home

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With the uncertainty that comes with separating and an unaffordable housing market, you may find yourself in a situation where you are still sharing a home with your ex-partner.  Divorcemag.com offers help for this less than ideal situation. 

Their suggestions for how to best enjoy the holiday are:

Consider the types of gifts you give your children and if they make sense for your situation and future changes.

Discuss whether you want to exchange gifts with the other parent. 

Consider abiding by future holiday splits of time for traditions.

Try your best to make the most of the Season and Enjoy it! 

For more detailed information click on the image above to be directed to the article.  

Remember, if you have disagreements about holiday schedules, budgets, expectations, mediation is a great way to resolve your disputes in a productive and cohesive way.  

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4/19/2022

How custody orders can protect children and parents

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abc4 news recently posted a story about the necessity of custody orders for parents who are separating or divorced.  

 “In order to go to a trial, you have to go to mediation first anyway.” He added that doing this as soon as possible may end up saving couples time, money, and even help to maintain a cordial relationship between parents. “I tell people a lot, if you are already agreeing on almost everything, go to mediation right away before something happens.” 

Done Mediation strives to help parents develop clear and concise parenting plans that have enforceable measures to protect children as needed.  

The story also says:

Should the cordial relationship among parents sour in the future, the custody order may provide additional security if the police need to become involved. Felt further explained: “If there is no court document, most of the time the police can only say, ‘I’m sorry, there is no order, there is nothing I can do about this. You need to take it to the court.’” 

Conflict between parents arises when one or both parties feel that their needs or expectations are not being met by the other.  Often times these areas of conflict can be avoided in the first place by having well thought out and clearly defined parenting plans in custody orders.  

It is vitally important that co-parents discuss what type of interaction and dynamic they want to have as co-parents.  In cases of high-conflict, it is often in the best interests for all parties that there be very limited interaction and clear boundaries to assure the comfort and safety of those bound by that order.  

For help with developing or modifying a custody order or parenting plan, contact Done Mediation today or schedule a session of mediation now.  

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8/24/2020

Dating after divorce?  Here's some help

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dating after divorce worksheet
Click to be directed to worksheet
An item of future conflict that is often overlooked when knee-deep in a divorce, is how both parties will address relationships with significant others in the future.  

The goal of mediation is to reduce the amount of conflict not only during divorce, but in a way that sets up a good foundation to avoid conflict in the future. 

This is a good article with a free worksheet for co-parents to use as a reference.  There is a lot to consider when it comes to when and how to introduce a new romantic partner to your co-parent and kids.  

Hello Divorce 


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6/22/2020

Celebrity exes who are committed to co-parenting their children - insider

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I don't often look to celebrities for their life choices, but in this case, it's great to see what ANYONE is doing for co-parenting that WORKS.  Co-parenting is such an essential part of an divorce.  It requires a lot of planning, communication and coordination.  

If you're looking to be inspired, check out this article on insider.com 

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6/21/2020

5 Signs Mediation Won’t Work for Your Divorce, According to a Mediation Expert - Dr. jann blackstone

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A new article on Yahoo.com goes over 5 basic signs that mediation may not prove to be productive. 

Dr. Jann Blackstone says they are:
1. There’s So Much Animosity, You Can’t Talk to Each Other
2. There’s a History of Drug or Alcohol Abuse or Domestic Violence
3. There’s a Mental Health Issue
4. There’s No Seeing Eye-to-Eye on Custody
5. One—or Both—Parties Aren’t Willing to Put in the Time Needed to Sort Things Out

​For more details and information, click on the link.  In the State of Utah, parents seeking divorce are REQUIRED to attempt mediation unless they have a court exception.  Just because it might not be productive does not mean you can avoid it all together.  If you are looking for a mediator, reach out to us today and schedule your mediation.  

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6/19/2020

Cost of litigated divorce vs. mediated divorce

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The Digital Journal posted this about the costs of litigated divorce vs. mediated divorce. 

"When going through a divorce process, money is often the last thing people want to add to their list of worries. Choosing to go through a litigated divorce is estimated to cost couples up to $32,000 and that’s if things go well as planned. In most cases, the cases don’t go well and even more money ends up being spent. Thankfully, mediated divorce offers a far more cost-effective alternative as everything can be mediated."

Read more: http://www.digitaljournal.com/pr/4715373#ixzz6Perjnhwq

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6/18/2020

Mediation Is the Secret to a Simple and Cost-Effective Divorce (by digitaljournal.com)

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Digital Journal just posted an article called 'Mediation is the Secret to a Simple and Cost-Effective Divorce.  

Naturally, this may seem obvious, but may still be an under utilized option.  

In many cases the emotional and mental distress caused by divorce can cause parties to have tunnel vision and render them incapable of thinking through possible alternatives that are less-costly.  

"Anger and disappointments are common feelings in most divorce negotiation processes. In most cases, the involved parties have a hard time reaching agreement on divorce issues such as child custody, division of property, child support, and visitation issues among others. However, mediation often provides the divorcing spouses an opportunity to take control of their future lives by resolving the contentious issues without the necessity of litigation."

Read more: http://www.digitaljournal.com/pr/4715373#ixzz6PeqffwL5

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3/30/2020

Family law week on covid-19 lockdown mediation

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Familylawweek.co.uk posted an article about how to have mediation during a lockdown.  They mention a lot of the issues that may need to be addressed during a lockdown situation: 

What are some of the issues that could be addressed in mediation, that separated parents are facing during this unprecedented time?

The following is by no means an exhaustive list, but sets out some examples:
  • The other parent refuses to talk to me about anything to do with the impact of Covid 19 on our parenting
  • I have symptoms of Covid 19 but my child is fine so can't they still go to the other parent and give me a break?
  • My child has symptoms of Covid 19 and so I want to keep them at home but the other parent is saying they think they have already had the virus and so are insisting that they are equally able to provide care
  • I am frightened that letting my child travel to the other parent will increase their risk of getting Covid 19
  • The other parent does not trust me to be as careful as them so they won't let my child come to stay with me at the moment
  • I want the care arrangements to continue because I need to work but the other parent says I am the main carer and should prioritise our child
  • Now that my child is not at school, and it's not school holidays, the other parent refuses to share the care of the child during what would have been the school day
  • I want to discuss changing the arrangements for the school holidays because we will now not be going away on holiday
  • I want to discuss other ways of having contact with my children whilst I have symptoms
  • I normally see my children in a contact centre but I have been told it is closed.


It is always helpful to look at other resources and see what other mediators are addressing during these ever-changing circumstances.  If you need mediation to discuss these issues, contact us today.  Don’t wait. 

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3/30/2020

Co-parenting in the covid-19 crisis

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timminstoday.com posted an article recently that gave some helpful tips to divorced parents.  Click on the link above to read it for yourself.  They gave much of the same advice as other articles mentioned in this blog pertaining to COVID-19, but they bring up the idea of keeping on task with creating a “temporary” parenting plan and leaving the big issues for later in this way: 

Nail down off-limit conversations
After ensuring children’s physical safety is looked after, Stewart advises mapping out how to protect their emotional health. One way is to put all conversations that lead to heated arguments or stress on hold.
“We’re not going to talk about the future financial situation. We’re not going to talk about long-term custody arrangements,” Stewart said.
“We are going to deal with this short term. So there should be some conversations that are taken off the table until this is done. If you’re dealing with lawyers, put them at bay.”


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3/29/2020

Custody issues in a time of coronavirus

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The Boston Herald recently posted an article called ‘Custody Issues in a Time of Coronavirus’.  A mother who works from home and has 3 school aged children is suddenly taking care of them full-time and asks their father to pay additional child support during this time as she cannot maintain full-time hours and is now caring for the children 24/7.  Author Wendy Hickey offers great legal advice on how to approach the conversation, prepare documentation, and the legal path forward.  

It seems this couple had a partial resolution for their parenting plan and failed to make it to the finish line.  A quick session of mediation might have helped fill in the gaps and relieve a lot of stress for everyone in the future.  

If you have questions about what the future holds during this pandemic, schedule a session of mediation today.  
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